<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/plusone.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d9866427\x26blogName\x3dSCOTWISE\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dBLUE\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttps://scotwise.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_US\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://scotwise.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d9048560822994539802', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>

Friday, December 02, 2005


A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. - Pro 17:22.

What a week this has been, it certainly flew by! I don’t know about you, but the older I get the weeks seem to fly by! Maybe it’s because I am so busy! Still, this is the start of my favourite time of the week, the WEEK-END! before you know it, we will be in Church with God’s family, roaring our head off, as we tell Him we love Him! Or if you are in one of those Churches, you know, the one’s where the noisiest thing is sweet papers rustling!

But, as for me and my family, we will be shouting our lungs out, as we worship the Lord, and I am the Pastor, if you think that’s loud, you should hear the folk’s shouting! Hallelujah! What a mighty God we serve!

The devil loves it when we are quiet and don’t clap our hands. It is amazing, we go to football matches, or other sporting events and roar our lungs out, but when we get into Church, we have to be quiet! Jesus is not nervous; He loves to hear us praise Him at full pelt! Hallelujah! Thank you Lord!

I believe that Jesus wants us to shout out His Gospel, in a way that the Town Crier would shout out his announcements!
And he said to them, "Go into all the world and proclaim the gospel to the whole creation. - Mar 16:15.

Anyway, whatever way we worship the Lord, it is good that we are in Church, that in itself is a great witness ! Here are a few laughs to keep you going until you experience the real joy on Sunday…

I forgot my Lord in the summertime
Just the time I was needed most.
I was not away, but on each Lord’s Day
I just failed to be at my post.
I forgot my church in the summertime
And lazily lay in bed.
While the faithful few had my work to do,
I was spiritually dead.
I forgot my offering in the summertime
When He needed it most of all.
While my cash was spent,
I was pleasure bent,
Just off duty for God until fall.
I forgot my soul in the summertime,
Got along without spiritual food.
While my Lord on high sent me blessings,
I showed Him naught but ingratitude.
If my Lord should come in the summertime
When from duty to God I’m free,
Wonder what I’ll do when my life is through,
If by chance He should forget me.--Author Unknown.

Q. How is playing the bagpipes like throwing a javelin blindfolded?
A. You don't have to be very good to get people's attention.
A lady came up to me on the street and pointed at my suede jacket. 'You know a cow was murdered for that jacket?' she sneered. I replied in a psychotic tone, 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too.
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was. She said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.
Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God....I could be eating a slow learner.
Have you heard the latest blonde joke? "Hey, can't you see I'm blonde?" "Oh, that's all right. I'll tell it very slowly and explain any big words."
A blonde orders a takeout pizza. The waiter asks, "Shall I cut it into six or twelve pieces." "Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."
A man walked into a bar and said 'Ouch!'
Lawyers - 99.9 percent of them give the rest of the profession a bad name.
Q. Why are most Blonde Jokes one-liners?

A. So that brunettes can remember them.
4 YEARS OF AGE - My Mommy can do anything!
8 YEARS OF AGE - My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!
12 YEARS OF AGE - My Mother doesn't really know quite everything.
14 YEARS OF AGE - Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either.
16 YEARS OF AGE - Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned.
18 YEARS OF AGE - That old woman? She's way out of date!
25 YEARS OF AGE - Well, she might know a little bit about it.
30 YEARS OF AGE - Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion.
40 YEARS OF AGE - Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?
60 YEARS OF AGE - Wish I could talk it over with Mom.....
One day a group of scientists got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. So they picked one scientist to go and tell Him that they were done with Him.

Blogotional walked up to God and said, "God, we've decided that we no longer need You. We're to the point that we can clone people and do many miraculous things, so why don't You just go on and get lost."

God listened very patiently and kindly to Blogotional.

After Blogotional was done talking, God said, "Very well, how about this? Let's say we have a man-making contest."

To which Blogotional replied, "Okay, great!"

But God added, "Now, we're going to do this just like I did back in the old days with Adam."

Blogotional said, "Sure, no problem" and bent down and grabbed himself a handful of dirt.

God looked at Blogotional and said, "No, no, no. You go get your own dirt!"
Some Real Beauties... for Blogotional, they drive him crazy! Isn't the Grand Canyon just gorges?
When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.
The eagles club formed an add hawk committee.
You should massage a cow's back before putting it out to posture.
When the drill bit was invented, it was a real turning point.
He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
A nut named Hazel held up a bank saying 'give me all the cashew have'.
Successful dieters might win the Nobelly prize.
Those who throw dirt are sure to lose ground.
That’s enough for now John, I don’t want you to split your sides!

Loving Father, help me by the power of the Holy Spirit, to remind myself that Jesus died to set me free, help me Lord to live that life, and be determined in Him to have a joyful heart, in Jesus wonderful name I pray, amen!


Be encouraged!

Site Meter