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Friday, November 25, 2005

DAILY ENCOURAGEMENT FRIDAY - A JOYFUL HEART. #8

A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. - Pro 17:22.

Well folks, it’s that time of the week to begin to celebrate the Weekend! Our friends in the USA are celebrating their Thanksgiving holidays, the great Turkey dinners and all its trimmings, time with their families and friends, many who travel interstate to celebrate with each other. God bless them, their families, their President and his family, and their great nation, as we wish them a happy holiday!

I love the weekend, and even though it is working time for me as a Pastor, I just love to see people enjoy what God intended them to enjoy, rest from their labour, spend time with their loved ones, catch up on all the things that they cannot do during working days. Our awesome God knows we needed this rest, and He factored it into our lives; so that we would be able to worship Him as His universal family, and spend time together doing so!

Time to Praise and Worship the Lord, time to fellowship with the saints, time for a challenging Sermon, time to bask in the love and warmth of the brothers and sisters in the Lord! Hallelujah! Praise the wonderful Name of Jesus! Here are a few laughs/thoughts to keep you going...

ONE LINERS:
"If mother always knows best, what happens when two mothers disagree?"
"There is always a lot to be thankful for, if you take the time to look. For example, I'm sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt."
"Going to church does not make you a Christian anymore than going to MacDonalds makes you a hamburger."
"I am grateful that I am not as judgmental as all those censorious, self-righteous people around me."
*“A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist”.
*“A bicycle can't stand on its own because it's two-tired.”
*A boy, frustrated with all the rules he had to follow, asked his father, "Dad, how soon will I be old enough to do as I please?" The father answered immediately, "I don't know. Nobody has lived that long yet."
*“A clean tie attracts the soup of the day.”
*“A computer beat me at chess once. But, it was no match for me at kick boxing.”
*“A diet is a selection of food that makes other people lose weight.
* Source.
-----------------------------
Where's the Turkey??

Ducking into confession with a turkey in his arms, Brian said, "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. I stole this turkey to feed my family. Would you take it and assuage my guilt?"

"Certainly not," said the priest. "As penance, you must return it to the one from whom you stole it."

"I tried," Brian sobbed, "but he refused. Oh, Father, what should I do?"

"If what you say is true, then it is all right for you to keep it for your family."

Thanking the priest, Brian hurried off. When confession was over, the priest returned to his residence. When he walked into the kitchen, he found that someone had stolen his Thanksgiving turkey.
------------------------------
HUMOR IN HYMNS
The sculptor's hymn CASTING ALL YOUR CARE
The flying duck's hymn HIS EYE IS ON THE SPARROW
Osama Ben Laden's hymn I'VE FOUND A FRIEND
The suspicious wife's hymn TELL ME THE OLD, OLD STORY
Israeli-Arab conflictors hymn ON JORDAN'S STORMY BANKS
The depressed person's hymn JUST AS I AM
The single person's hymn HOW CAN I BE LONELY
The liberal theologian's hymn WHEN WE ALL GET TO HEAVEN
The sailor's hymn MY ANCHOR HOLDS
The dressmaker's hymn THE HEM OF HIS GARMENT
The independent person's hymn TAKE MY LIFE AND LET IT BE
The sunbather's hymn HEAVENLY SUNSHINE
The farmer's hymn THERE SHALL BE SHOWERS OF BLESSING
The horticulturalist's hymn CHRIST A-ROSE
The egotist's hymn IS MY NAME WRITTEN THERE
The Utopian's hymn IN THE SWEET BY AND BY
The Laundryuser's hymn WHITER THAN SNOW
The late nightshift crew member's hymn NO NIGHT THERE
The coal miners hymn STEPPING IN THE LIGHT
The Pied Piper's hymn I LOVE TO TELL THE STORY
The Potlucker's hymn BRING YOUR VESSELS NOT A FEW
The Elephant Hunter's hymn IVORY PALACES
The Psychiatrist's hymn IN THE HOLLOW OF HIS HAND
The geologist's hymn ROCK OF AGES
The sinking ship's captain's hymn LET THE LOWER LIGHTS BE BURNING
The World Traveler's hymn ANYWHERE WITH JESUS
-Author unknown.

‘TWAS THE NIGHT OF THANKSGIVING
But I just couldn’t sleep.

I tried counting backwards, I tried counting sheep.
The leftovers beckoned —the dark meat and white—
But I fought the temptation with all of my might.

Tossing and turning with anticipation,
The thought of a snack became infatuation.
So, I raced to the kitchen, flung open the door,
And gazed at the fridge, full of goodies galore.

I gobbled up turkey and buttered potatoes,
Pickles and carrots, beans and tomatoes.
I felt myself swelling so plumb and so round,
‘Til all of a sudden, I rose off the ground.

I crashed through the ceiling floating into the sky
With a mouthful of pudding and a handful of pie.
But, I managed to yell as I soared past the trees…
“Happy eating to all! Pass the cranberries, please!

“May your stuffing be tasty, may your turkey be plump;
May your potatoes ‘n gravy have nary a lump.
May your yams be delicious, may your pies take the prize.
May your thanksgiving dinner stay off of your thighs.”
- Author Unknown.
------------------------------
Some Real Groaners... for Blogotional. Cos he loves them!
What did the one fly say to the second? Time to send in the swat team.
Puns are the worst vice, and there's no vice versa.
The string went to the dance and had a ball.
Small surfers ride micro waves.
The dieter was at his width's end.
I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
Gravity is studied a lot because it's a very attractive field.
A racehorse's life is always on track.
Peacocks are meticulous because they show attention to de tail.
A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said 'No change yet'.
We were so poor when I was growing up we couldn't even afford to pay attention.
How do you make antifreeze? Steal her blanket.

SO ONCE AGAIN LET US REMIND OURSELVES, THAT BEING CHEERFUL KEEPS YOU HEALTHY. IT IS SLOW DEATH TO BE GLOOMY ALL THE TIME!

Loving Father, help me by the power of the Holy Spirit, to remind myself that Jesus died to set me free, help me Lord to live that life, and be determined in Him to have a joyful heart, in Jesus wonderful name I pray, amen!

HAVE A GREAT AND GODLY WEEKEND!

Be encouraged!

GBYAY

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