A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. - Pro 17:22.
Friday has come and brings to an end another working week. What better way to get into a good frame of mind than to end it with a good laugh…
The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so a blonde went in to try out for the job."Okay, honey," the sheriff drawled, "What is 1 and 1?"
"Eleven," she replied.
The sheriff thought to himself, "That's not what I meant, but she's right."
Then the sheriff asked, "What two days of the week start with the letter 'T'?".
"Today and Tomorrow," she replied.
He was again surprised that the blonde supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself.
"Now, listen carefully, who killed Abraham Lincoln?", asked the sheriff.
The blonde looked a little surprised herself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, "I don't know."
The sheriff replied, "Well, why don't you go on and work on that one for a while?"
So, the blonde wandered over to the beauty parlor, where her buds were waiting to hear the results of the interview.
The blonde was overjoyed. "It went great! First day on the job and I'm already working on a murder case!"
A blonde was driving home one night when she suddenly found herself in the middle of a bad hail storm. The hailstones were the size of golf balls. Her car was dented beyond description.
The next day, she took it to a repair shop. Noticing that she was blonde, the technician decided to have some fun.
He told her to take the car home and blow real hard into the tailpipe and the dents would pop out.
When she got home, she started blowing into the tailpipe as she was instructed. At that moment, her blonde girlfriend drove by and saw her puffing on the tailpipe.
Thinking the worst, the friend was startled and said, "What are you doing?"
She said that the man at the body shop told her to blow into the tail pipe real hard and the dents would pop out.
Her girlfriend said, "Well, duhhhhhh! You need to roll up the windows first!"
Sven and Ole…
Sven was out shopping in the mall when he met his friend Ole outside the Jewellery Store. Ole noticed that Sven had a small gift-wrapped box in his hand.
Vhat have you just purchased Sven?" Ole asks.
Vell, now that you've asked," replies Sven, "It's my Lena's birthday tomorrow And vhen I asked her this morning vhat she vanted for her birthday, Lena said, “Oh, I dun know, dear, yust give me something with vots of diamonds.
"So vhat did you get her?" Ole asks.Sven smirks and says, "I bought her a deck of cards."
Double Decker Bus…
Two bowling teams, one of all blondes and one of all brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Sydney.
The brunette team rides on the bottom of the bus. The blonde team rides on the top level.
The brunette team down below is partying having a great time, when one of them realizes she doesn't hear anything from the blondes upstairs.
She decides to get up and investigate. When the brunette reaches the top, she finds all the blondes frozen in fear, staring straight ahead at the road, and clutching the seats in front of them with white knuckles.
The brunette asks, "What the heck's going on up here? We're having a great time downstairs!"
One of the blondes looks up at her, swallows hard and says, "YEAH, BUT YOU'VE GOT A DRIVER!"
A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, and looked at the old pages as he turned them.Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that had been pressed in between the pages.
"Momma, look what I found," the boy called out.
"What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked.
With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered: "I think it's Adam's suit!"
A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me, I have a jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started.
Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?
"The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.
She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger."
He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then....." he sighed, ...let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."
WE ARE REMINDED THAT BEING CHEERFUL KEEPS US HEALTHY… IT IS SLOW DEATH TO BE GLOOMY ALL THE TIME!
Loving Father, help me by the power of the Holy Spirit, to remind myself that Jesus died to set me free, help me Lord to live that life, and be determined in Him to have a cheerful heart, in Jesus wonderful Name I pray, amen!
HAVE A GREAT AND GODLY WEEKEND!
Labels: Cheerful Heart, Daily Encouragement, Friday Humour, Jokes