DAILY ENCOURAGEMENT FRIDAY – A CHEERFUL HEART #68.
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. - Pro 17:22.
Friday has come and brings to an end another working week. What better way to get into a good frame of mind than to end it with a good laugh…
An atheist complained to a Christian friend, "You Christians have your special holidays, such as Christmas and Easter. Jews celebrate their national holidays, such as Passover and Yom Kippur. But we atheists have no recognized national holidays. It's unfair discrimination."His friend replied, "Why don't you celebrate April first?"
--------------
One day a trucker stopped at a diner for lunch. When he gets his order a biker gang comes in and starts making fun of the trucker. The trucker doesn't do anything. He gets up pays for his meal and leaves.
One of the bikers goes to the man at the cash register and says "not much of a man is he."
"No" said the cashier, "aint much of a driver either, he just backed over twelve of your motorcycles".
-------------
Q : HOW DO YOU GET A ONE ARMED BLONDE OUT OF A TREE ?
A : YOU WAVE AT HER !
----------------
There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead they all were running from a cop They ran through a field and found a farm . They went into the barn and found 3 barrels, one was full of dogs one was full of cats and one was full of potatoes and they got in them. The cop came up to the first barrel and hit it and the brunette went ruff, ruff, then he went up to the second barrel and hit it and the red head went meow, meow, then he went up to the third barrel and hit it and the blond said potato, potato.
------------
One day a blonde girl went to the store and told the guy she wanted that TV over there but the guy said we don’t sell it to blondes. So she went back to her house and died her hair red she went back to the store and told the guy that she wanted that TV over there but the guy said we don’t sell it to blondes. So she went back to her house and died her hair brown went back to the store and told the guy she wanted that TV over there but the guy said we don’t sell it to blondes. So the girl said how do you know I’m a blonde, and then he said because that TV over there that you want is a microwave!!!
------------
A 70-year-old man goes to the doctor's for a physical.The doctor runs some tests and says to the man, "Well, everything seems to be in top condition physically, but what about mentally? How is your connection with God?"And the man says, "Oh me and God? We're tight. We have a real bond, he's good to me. Every night when I have to get up to go to the bathroom, he turns on the light for me, and then, when I leave, he turns it back off."Well, upon hearing this, the doctor was astonished.He called the man's wife and said, "I'd like to speak to you about your husband's connection with God. He claims that every night when he needs to use the restroom, God turns on the light for him and turns it off for him again when he leaves. Is this true?"And she says, "That idiot, he's been peeing in the refrigerator!"
------------
FAITH
The African impala can jump to a height of over 10 feet and cover a distance of greater than 30 feet. Yet these magnificent creatures can be kept in an enclosure in any zoo with a 3-foot wall. The animals will not jump if they cannot see where their feet will fall. Faith is the ability to trust what we cannot see, and with faith we are freed from the flimsy enclosures of life that only fear allows to entrap us.
- John Emmons.
------------
Two guys, Joe & Bill went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, they fell sound asleep.Some hours later, Joe wakes his faithful friend and says, "Bill, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."Bill replies, "I see millions of stars.""What does that tell you?" asked Joe.Bill ponders for a minute, and then says, "Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies, and potentially billions of planets.Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in themorning. Theologically, it's evident theLord is all-powerful and we are small, and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you, Joe?"Joe is silent for a moment, then says, "Bill, you idiot! Someone has stolen our tent"!
WE ARE REMINDED THAT BEING CHEERFUL KEEPS US HEALTHY… IT IS SLOW DEATH TO BE GLOOMY ALL THE TIME!
Friday has come and brings to an end another working week. What better way to get into a good frame of mind than to end it with a good laugh…
An atheist complained to a Christian friend, "You Christians have your special holidays, such as Christmas and Easter. Jews celebrate their national holidays, such as Passover and Yom Kippur. But we atheists have no recognized national holidays. It's unfair discrimination."His friend replied, "Why don't you celebrate April first?"
--------------
One day a trucker stopped at a diner for lunch. When he gets his order a biker gang comes in and starts making fun of the trucker. The trucker doesn't do anything. He gets up pays for his meal and leaves.
One of the bikers goes to the man at the cash register and says "not much of a man is he."
"No" said the cashier, "aint much of a driver either, he just backed over twelve of your motorcycles".
-------------
Q : HOW DO YOU GET A ONE ARMED BLONDE OUT OF A TREE ?
A : YOU WAVE AT HER !
----------------
There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead they all were running from a cop They ran through a field and found a farm . They went into the barn and found 3 barrels, one was full of dogs one was full of cats and one was full of potatoes and they got in them. The cop came up to the first barrel and hit it and the brunette went ruff, ruff, then he went up to the second barrel and hit it and the red head went meow, meow, then he went up to the third barrel and hit it and the blond said potato, potato.
------------
One day a blonde girl went to the store and told the guy she wanted that TV over there but the guy said we don’t sell it to blondes. So she went back to her house and died her hair red she went back to the store and told the guy that she wanted that TV over there but the guy said we don’t sell it to blondes. So she went back to her house and died her hair brown went back to the store and told the guy she wanted that TV over there but the guy said we don’t sell it to blondes. So the girl said how do you know I’m a blonde, and then he said because that TV over there that you want is a microwave!!!
------------
A 70-year-old man goes to the doctor's for a physical.The doctor runs some tests and says to the man, "Well, everything seems to be in top condition physically, but what about mentally? How is your connection with God?"And the man says, "Oh me and God? We're tight. We have a real bond, he's good to me. Every night when I have to get up to go to the bathroom, he turns on the light for me, and then, when I leave, he turns it back off."Well, upon hearing this, the doctor was astonished.He called the man's wife and said, "I'd like to speak to you about your husband's connection with God. He claims that every night when he needs to use the restroom, God turns on the light for him and turns it off for him again when he leaves. Is this true?"And she says, "That idiot, he's been peeing in the refrigerator!"
------------
FAITH
The African impala can jump to a height of over 10 feet and cover a distance of greater than 30 feet. Yet these magnificent creatures can be kept in an enclosure in any zoo with a 3-foot wall. The animals will not jump if they cannot see where their feet will fall. Faith is the ability to trust what we cannot see, and with faith we are freed from the flimsy enclosures of life that only fear allows to entrap us.
- John Emmons.
------------
Two guys, Joe & Bill went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, they fell sound asleep.Some hours later, Joe wakes his faithful friend and says, "Bill, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."Bill replies, "I see millions of stars.""What does that tell you?" asked Joe.Bill ponders for a minute, and then says, "Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies, and potentially billions of planets.Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in themorning. Theologically, it's evident theLord is all-powerful and we are small, and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you, Joe?"Joe is silent for a moment, then says, "Bill, you idiot! Someone has stolen our tent"!
WE ARE REMINDED THAT BEING CHEERFUL KEEPS US HEALTHY… IT IS SLOW DEATH TO BE GLOOMY ALL THE TIME!
Loving Father, help me by the power of the Holy Spirit, to remind myself that Jesus died to set me free, help me Lord to live that life, and be determined in Him to have a cheerful heart, in Jesus wonderful Name I pray, amen!
HAVE A GREAT AND GODLY WEEKEND!
Be encouraged!
GBYAY
Labels: Cheerful Heart, Daily Encouragement, Friday Humour, Jokes
posted by John @ 12:06 AM
<< Home