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Friday, October 27, 2006

DAILY ENCOURAGEMENT FRIDAY – A CHEERFUL HEART #41.

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. - Pro 17:22.

Friday has come and brings to an end another working week. What better way to get into a good frame of mind than to end it with a good laugh, especially at the Scots expense…

Sandy was drinking at a pub all night…
When he got up to leave, he fell flat on his face.
He tried to stand again, but to no avail, falling flat on his face. He decided to crawl outside and get some fresh air to see whether that would sober him up. Once outside, he stood up and, sure enough, fell flat on his face. So, being a practical Scot, he crawled all the way home.

When he got to the door, he stood up yet again, but fell flat on his face. He crawled through the door into his bedroom. When he reached his bed, he tried once more to stand upright. This time he managed to pull himself to his feet but fell into bed. He was sound asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow.

He woke the next morning to his wife shaking him and shouting,
"So, ye've been oot drinkin' as usual!"

"Why would ye say that?"
he complained innocently.

"Because the pub called an' ye left yer wheelchair there again!"
-------------

A Scottish newspaper ad…
"Lost - a £5 note. Sentimental value.”
------------
The Average Englishman…
In his home
he calls his castle, puts on his national costume - A shabby Raincoat patented by Charles MacIntosh of Glasgow, Scotland.

He drives a car fitted with tyres invented by John Boyd Dunlop of Dreghorn, Scotland.

At the office he receives his mail with adhesive stamps which, although they bear the queen of England's head, were invented by John Chambers of Dundee, Scotland.

During the day he uses the telephone, Invented by Alexander Graham Bell of Edinburgh, Scotland.

At home in the evening he watches his daughter ride her bicycle, invented by Kilpatrick MacMillan, A Blacksmith from Dumfries, Scotland.

He watches the news on television which was invented by John Logie Baird of Helensburough Scotland and hears an item about the U.S. Navy founded by John Paul Jones of Kirkbean, Scotland.


He has now been reminded too much of Scotland and in desperation picks up the Bible, only to find that the first man mentioned in the good book is a Scot - King James VI - who authorized it's translation.

No where can an Englishman turn to escape the ingenuity of the Scots, he could take to drink but the Scots make the finest in the world, he could take a rifle and end it all but the breech-loading rifle was invented by Captain Patrick Ferguson of Pitfours, Scotland.


If he escaped death, he could find himself on an operating table, being injected with Penicillin, discovered by Alexander Fleming of Darvel, Scotland, and given an anesthetic, discovered by Sir James Young Simpson of Bathgate, Scotland.

Out of the anesthetic he would find no comfort in learning that he was as safe as the Bank Of England which was founded by William Patterson of Dumfries, Scotland.

Perhaps his only hope would be to get a transfusion of good SCOTTISH blood!
-----------------

LOVE…
A young man said to his father at breakfast one morning, "Dad, I'm going to get married."

"How do you know you're ready to get married?" asked the father. "Are you in love?"

"I sure am," said the son.

"How do you know you're in love?" asked the father.

"Last night as I was kissing my girlfriend good-night, her dog bit me and I didn't feel the pain until I got home."

-----------------
Wee Hughie And His Girlfriend…
Wee Hughie adored and loved his girlfriend, Lorraine, to whom he was engaged to be married. wedding plans were well underway, and he was looking forward to spending the rest of his life with Lorraine.

However, a beautiful young lady, called Clearly, came to work in his glen and they found that they got on together very well and as time went by, Wee Hughie realised that he was in love with Clearly and that the Love was reciprocated.

Being a gentleman he decided that as he had promised to marry Lorraine he would do so and steadily removed himself from his other relationship.

One day, he and Lorraine were walking along the banks of the River Tay. As they walked, Lorraine slipped and fell into the river and was swept away and drowned.

He stood on the bank for a few minutes feeling very sad before walking away singing happily. And this is what he sang.

"I can see Clearly now Lorraine has gone"

WE ARE REMINDED THAT BEING CHEERFUL KEEPS US HEALTHY… IT IS SLOW DEATH TO BE GLOOMY ALL THE TIME!

Loving Father, help me by the power of the Holy Spirit, to remind myself that Jesus died to set me free, help me Lord to live that life, and be determined in Him to have a cheerful heart, in Jesus wonderful Name I pray, amen!

HAVE A GREAT AND GODLY WEEKEND!

Be encouraged!
GBYAY

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