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Friday, March 24, 2006

DAILY ENCOURAGEMENT FRIDAY - A JOYFUL HEART. #19.

A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. - Pro 17:22.

Oh boy! What a busy week that was! Thank God it is Friday and the weekend is here. Time to catch up on family and friends, time to catch up on those little chores around the house, time to read that book, time for a BBQ, and time to meet up with God’s family at Church on Sunday! Hallelujah! What a mighty God we serve!

Here’s a good way to kick off your wonderful weekend…
ONE LINERS
I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was going to blame you.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
I get enough exercise just pushing my luck.
I just got lost in thought, it was unfamiliar territory.
I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
I took an IQ test and the results were negative.
I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure. I
used to have a handle on life, and then it broke.
I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
I won't rise to the occasion, but I'll slide over to it.
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AUSTRALIAN EMPIRE

John Howard, the chirpy Australian Prime Minister, flies to England for a meeting with the Queen. Over a cup of tea, Howard brings up his grand new plans for his country.

"Your Majesty, mate, can we turn Australia into a kingdom, in order to increase its force in the world market?"

The Queen shakes her head and replies, "One needs a king for a kingdom, Mr Howard and unfortunately you are most certainly not a king."

Not to be dissuaded, Johnny asks, "Would it be possible just to transform Australia into an empire then?" "No, you chubby-faced chap," snorts the Queen, "for an empire you need an emperor, and you are most certainly not an emperor."

Howard thinks for a moment and then asks if it is possible to turn Australia into a principality. The Queen replies, "For a principality, you need a prince, and you Mr Howard are definitely not a prince."

Pausing for a sip of her tea, Her Majesty then adds: "To be quite honest, having met both you and several other Australians, I think Australia is still best suited as a COUNTRY."
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FOR ALL MY CANADIAN FRIENDS!

You know you’re a Canadian when . . . .

1) You only know three spices - salt, pepper and ketchup.
2) Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled in with snow.
3) You think sexy lingerie is tube-socks and a flannel nightie with only 8 buttons.
4) You owe more money on your snowmobile than your car.
5) The local paper covers national and international headlines on 1 page, but requires 6 pages for hockey.
7) At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant.
8) The most effective mosquito repellent is a shotgun.
9) Your snow blower gets stuck on the roof.
10) You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
11) You find -40C a little chilly.
12) The trunk of your car doubles as a deep freezer.
13) You attend a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewellery and your Sorrels.
14) You actually get these jokes and forward them to all your Canadian friends.
--------------------------
GOODNESS OF GOD
One of God's faithful missionaries, Allen Gardiner, experienced many physical difficulties and hardships throughout his service to the Savior. Despite his troubles, he said, "While God gives me strength, failure will not daunt me." In 1851, at the age of 57, he died of disease and starvation while serving on Picton Island at the southern tip of South America.

When his body was found, his diary lay nearby. It bore the record of hunger, thirst, wounds, and loneliness. The last entry in his little book showed the struggle of his shaking hand as he tried to write legibly. It read, "I am overwhelmed with a sense of the goodness of God."
---------------------------
PUNS OF THE WEEK FOR MY FRIEND – BLOGOTIONAL, HE LOVES THEM SO MUCH… THEY SHARPEN HIS MIND.
1. On a lark, the bird watcher was robin the liquor store, even though he couldn't swallow.
2. This is some pretty good tapioca. That's one way of pudding it.
3. Have you ever been to Engagement, Ohio? It's between Dayton and Marysville.
4. The frog went unnoticed in the milkshake because it blended so well.
5. You can't trust a tiger. You never know when he might be lion.
6. A garbage man digging through the trash says - Man, am I down in the dumps today.
7. If you don't pursue your dream of being a great and compassionate landlord, does that make you a lesser lessor?
8. When the Nomadic tree senses danger it packs up its trunk and leaves.
9. Rosemary was always late delivering packages. This prompted the head of International Herbs & Spices to call her supervisor, demanding to speak to the parcel sage about Rosemary and time.
10. When you get a transfusion in a Taiwanese hospital, you receive Taipei blood.
11. Jack and Jill is the best nursery rhyme as others pail in comparison.
12. The truly enlightened have homes with two Karma garages.
13. My favorite allergy song is Blowin' in the Wind by Peter, Pollen, Mary.
14. The math teacher was hungry, but all she had to eat was a piece of pi.

SO ONCE AGAIN LET US REMIND OURSELVES, THAT BEING CHEERFUL KEEPS YOU HEALTHY. IT IS SLOW DEATH TO BE GLOOMY ALL THE TIME!

Loving Father, help me by the power of the Holy Spirit, to remind myself that Jesus died to set me free, help me Lord to live that life, and be determined in Him to have a joyful heart, in Jesus wonderful name I pray, amen!

HAVE A GREAT AND GODLY WEEKEND!

Be encouraged!

GBYAY

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