<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/plusone.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d9866427\x26blogName\x3dSCOTWISE\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dBLUE\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttp://scotwise.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_US\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://scotwise.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d5347480519749768188', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>

Friday, February 24, 2006

DAILY ENCOURAGEMENT FRIDAY - A JOYFUL HEART #15.

A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. - Pro 17:22.

Once again we are coming to the end of another working week, and the weekend is fast approaching! At last we can have some time to ourselves, and do something that we want to do, not because we have too. Time for family and friends, for a BBQ, or as my friends in the USA would say, a ‘Cookout!’

Whatever we call it sure is fun! Time to read a book, listen to some music uninterrupted! Time to visit friends and relatives, time to see brethren and sistern at Church on Sunday! Praise the wonderful Name of Jesus!

Chill out! Here is some stuff to make you have a fit of laughing...
ONE LINER’S

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

How does Teflon stick to the pan?
Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.
Genius does what it must, talent does what it can, and you had best do what you're told.
Chocolate: the OTHER major food group.

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand.
Energizer Bunny arrested and charged with battery.
Good judgment comes from bad experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
----------------------------

Flying Home For The Holidays.
A student was heading home for the holidays. When she got to the airline counter, she presented her ticket to Houston. And as she gave the agent her luggage, she made this remark, "I'd like you to send my green suitcase to Hawaii, and my red suitcase to London."


The confused agent said, "I'm sorry, we can't to that." "Really??? I am so relieved to hear you say that because... That's exactly what you did to my luggage last year!"

Blonde Golfers.
Two blondes were playing golf at a foggy par three, and could see the flag, but not the green. Each hit their ball anyway. When they walked to the green, they discovered one about three feet from the cup, while the other somehow had gone directly in.


They tried to figure out which ball belonged to who, since they were both using Titleist number threes. Unable to decide, they returned to the Club House and asked the golf pro for a ruling.

After hearing their story and congratulating them both on their superb shots under such adverse conditions he asked, "OK, so who was playing the yellow ball ?"

STATISTICS AND STUFF.
The "Coronary and Ulcer Club" lists the following rules for members...

1. Your job comes first. Forget everything else.

2. Saturdays, Sundays, and holidays are fine times to be working at the office. There will be nobody else there to bother you.
3. Always have your briefcase with you when not at your desk. This provides an opportunity to review completely all the troubles and worries of the day.
4. Never say "no" to a request. Always say "yes."
5. Accept all invitations to meetings, banquets, committees, etc.
6. All forms of recreation are a waste of time.
7. Never delegate responsibility to others; carry the entire load yourself.
8. If your work calls for traveling, work all day and travel at night to keep that appointment you made for eight the next morning.
9. No matter how many jobs you already are doing, remember you always can take on more. - Bits & Pieces.

PUNS OF THE WEEK FOR MY FRIEND, BLOGOTIONAL, BECAUSE HE NEEDS HIS WEEKLY FIX!

1."Is that pure rump roast?" - "Nothing butt."
2. A patient came running to my psychiatry office screaming "I'm a teepee! I'm a wigwam!" I told him "Relax, you're two tents".
3. Yesterday a cow saved my life - it was bovine intervention.
4. The incontinent Scotsman had a wee accident.
5. Make like mustard and catch up!
6. A boy told his parents he wanted to raise goats for a living, but he was only kidding.
7. If a horse could predict the weather, it would probably say that the weather is stable.
8. A family went to watch a 007 movie at the theatre, it was a bonding experience.
9. The soundtrack for the killer whale movie was orcastrated. 10. If actions speak louder than words then why can't you hear mime artists?
11. Those changing baby diapers sometimes act rashly.
12. He got a chemistry set with a promise not to hurt himself. That was the acid test.


SO ONCE AGAIN LET US REMIND OURSELVES, THAT BEING CHEERFUL KEEPS YOU HEALTHY. IT IS SLOW DEATH TO BE GLOOMY ALL THE TIME!

Loving Father, help me by the power of the Holy Spirit, to remind myself that Jesus died to set me free, help me Lord to live that life, and be determined in Him to have a joyful heart, in Jesus wonderful name I pray, amen!

HAVE A GREAT AND GODLY WEEKEND!

Be encouraged!
GBYAY

Site Meter